We (actually Mr. Fix-it) received two white envelopes with checks this week. They were inside the sympathy cards from my mom and cousin. Somehow, seeing that from my mom broke me up more than any of the other sympathy cards we received. Maybe because I knew she was following tradition. Or maybe because I knew she really didn't have the money to send (heck, I sent her a check earlier this year). Or maybe because it was a symbol of how much she cares. Mr. Fix-it thought it was a little weird, but considering how much a funeral costs and considering that it is a symbol of caring and considering that is a tradition I grew up with, we will accept the money graciously and gratefully.
On the other hand, I'm not such a traditionalist that I left all the flowers at the cemetery. I forgot that it was bad luck to take home the flowers. I couldn't resist because I hated the thought of hundreds of dollars of flowers rotting in the sun. Besides, my FIL would also have been appalled at the waste. So somehow, in bringing some of the flowers home, I think I'm honoring him a little bit.